1. |
McDouble
03:48
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And the truth is, I just don’t want to
And if you ask me, I’m not in the mood
I’ll find a little place
One that’s tucked away
And hide my face from all the shit I have to get done that day
I’ll read all the words
And twist my face into a knot
With my feet stuck in the mud there’s no weight attached to thought
I can’t move to turn out the lights
My left shoe’s laced up way too tight
I read the news too late at night
And make excuses every morning
In the meantime, I’ll just stay quiet
And if you ask me, I’ll smile and nod
I find it hard to cope
With all opposing sides
And when the voices that are loudest are the ones in my mind
I’ll squint and close my eyes
And put my hands out to the wall to catch my balance in the dark when I feel I’m gonna fall -
I can’t move to turn out the lights
My left shoe’s laced up way too tight
I read the news too late at night
And make excuses every morning
I can’t move to turn out the lights
My left shoe’s laced up way too tight
I read the news too late at night
And make excuses every morning
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2. |
Blast Off
03:28
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I’ve heard that all
empaths take the world in like a sponge
Can we talk about you?
I’ll redirect like it’s my job
Is the world too small
to keep it just discreet enough that I’m everyone I’ve ever met and then some?
Try the make up and decide
The self you can confide
The things you hate most and not explode at blast off
In the perfect scene
I’m drifting downstream on a lily pad
If we talk about me
the fish will pull me under, it’s a trap
I could beach my fears
if I didn’t think they’d swim right back to make the rapids a different ball game
Try, try
Try to make first impressions genuine
Make up and decide
The creation you can make out of yourself
You can confide that every time
The things you hate most will not explode at blast off
I keep a box up on the shelf of shit that I’m keeping from myself
It says, “Don’t open ‘til you turn 80”
So I keep waiting
I sit in sessions every week where I talk in circles while you fall asleep
I empty my pockets for progress I’m wasting
So I’ll keep waiting
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3. |
Just Friends
04:16
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I couldn’t find the answers you were asking for
Said out-of-line, generic things that made less sense
You’d be right to ghost me for the next five years
I fantasized how everything would be different
I’d pick and choose the feelings I’d acknowledge less
And bring them out whenever it was convenient
But at the time you wanted him when I wanted you
Reminiscent of the shit that I put you through
Did we both see what would happen
If we stayed the way we had been?
Did we both see what would happen
The way it had been?
How would it have happened?
If we crossed paths ten more years down the road would you
Say we
Should stay
Just friends?
Held back these feelings I thought would go away ‘cause one day I
Said we
Should be
Just friends
But we’re too old to play these games
Maybe this is not the best time, I’ll go take
My indecisive tendencies to my stupid grave
It shouldn’t be this hard to feel and know what I want
With disregard for what I’ve been told by everyone
But maybe I’m just too afraid that I’ll take up space
And inconvenience everybody who comes my way
But I’ve got friends who look their monsters right in the face
And say, “you will not destroy me ‘cause I won’t let you”
No I won’t let you
And the water’s getting warmer everyday
It’s either boil the frog or catch it in the rain
If we crossed paths ten more years down the road would you
Say we
Should stay
Just friends?
Held back these feelings I thought would go away cause one day i
Said we
Should be
Just friends
But we’re too old to play these games
Is 28 too old to say I’m gay?
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4. |
School Nights
04:34
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Every night this week I’ve had a feeling I should swallow fire
And find a lake to dive in with my clothes on
To put it out when I’m tired
Then I get too comfortable
To flip the switch from off to on again
Waving my hands I’m in trouble
The shallows open up and deepen
I’ve
Got a stack of books that I could start tonight but I
Instead play dark souls 3 for the hundredth time and I
Can go to sleep on time tonight but I
Instead stay up til 3 under my cell phone light
Not on school nights
Except for Sundays or when it feels right
Not to sound trite
But we’re both young, why am I acting so uptight?
Every day I wake up with a grimace like I knocked out my teeth
Roll out of bed with my eyes shut tightly all while I’m trying hard to breath deep
And then I’m feeling uncomfortable
Like I would take it all back again
Melted ice starts to form a puddle
When the shallows open up and deepen
I’ve
Got a stack of books that I could start tonight but I
Instead play dark souls 3 for the hundredth time and I
Can go to sleep on time tonight but I
Instead stay up til 3 under my cell phone light
Not on school nights
Except for Sundays or when it feels right
Not to sound trite
But we’re both young, why am I acting so uptight?
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gosh diggity Chicago, Illinois
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